


No Nut November Challenge

by Pepsi_Or_Coke



Category: Hazbin Hotel (Web Series)
Genre: 3 way relationship, 30 day writing challenge, Alastory putting his mates in their places, All for humor, Asexual Alastor, Bisexual Lucifer, Canon LGBTQ Character, Gay Alastor, Gay Angel Dust, Horny Angel, Horny Lucifer, Humor, Lucifer has more control than Angel, M/M, Multi, No nut november, Nobody fucks with Lucifer, Polyamory, Random - Freeform, a lot of cussing, lgbtq theme, well mostly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-21
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2021-02-25 23:40:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21513925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pepsi_Or_Coke/pseuds/Pepsi_Or_Coke
Summary: Alastor, Lucifer, and Angel are jumped into a challenge. Sadly, they all lose their minds in some way from the start
Relationships: Alastor/Angel Dust (Hazbin Hotel), Alastor/Angel Dust/Lucifer (Hazbin Hotel), Alastor/Lucifer (Hazbin Hotel)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 141





	1. Ace Panic Screams

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know much about Lucifer, so forgive me if his character is off. I mostly did this for the laughs but also because I ship them all >w<
> 
> Alastor is still ASEXUAL! He does NOT like the idea of sex but he does participate in activities as Lucifer and Angel are still his mates/lovers. That being said, he's not participating in sex itself, but more of the grinding, blow jobs, hand jobs, sex toys, so on

Alastor has been avoiding two of his lovers; Angel and Lucifer. Don't get him wrong, he loved his mates, but they were overwhelming as fuck and he needed space from them. Sadly space don't want him as soon he was face planting to the ground with his spider mate on top of him

"Daddy Alastor~ what do you think you are doing?" Angel said with a purr as he nuzzles Alastor's cheek

"Off, Angel, before I tear you off of my Queen." A new, deeper voice said not far from Alastor and Angel. His hair white as snow and short, yet his eyes piercing and cold

Angel shrinks back and quickly gets off of Alastor. Sitting on his knees like a good boy as he awaits new orders

Alastor gets up and dusts off himself, irritated yet thankful his mate was around (though that didn't last) as soon he felt his mate's hands around him and his lips on his neck. He shudders and whines. "Lucifer, stop," he tried

Lucifer smirks, licking his neck. "No, I don't think I want to. I may allow so much, especially with a poly relationship with our spider slut, but you know I **hate** seeing _anyone_ marking you are theirs from me." He growled out, his nails digging into Alastor's sides

Alastor froze, letting all of that sink in before he turned his staff and beats Lucifer with it. "GET YOUR DAMN HANDS OFF OF ME BOTH OF YOU! FUCKING ANIMALS, I SWEAR!"

Angel was snickering as he watches his Daddy beat the living his out of his Master before he paled as Alastor turned on him and a loud snap heard as Alastor's neck FUCKING SNAPPED! Angel felt himself grew rather cold before he bolted

"GET BACK HERE YOU WORTHLESS SPIDER!" Alastor screeches as he ran after his lover with his dented staff in hand and Lucifer down on the ground bloody but laughing before he soon joined on the chase


	2. Starting Now

Alastor thought he would be safe in his own room. I mean, who wouldn't? But FUCK does something hate him right now as his door was caved in, his room was just gone and dusted off, and he is now being carried back to a shared room with Lucifer's arm around him and a smirking Spider behind. He just glared at Angel while he thinks of a way to chop off Lucifer's balls and selling Angel to the nearest demon for the highest bid

Upon arriving to the room, Lucifer tossed Alastor onto the bed while Angel chains the door closed. "Now, we can do this the easy way or the hard way, my love." Lucifer said with honey in his voice as he faces Alastor

"I prefer the hard way, myself." Angel said from the back, his eyes on Alastor but shifts between the two. He's maybe with Alastor but Lucifer was Alastor's first and more powerful than himself. He just considers himself lucky

"Of course you world, worthless bitch." Alastor said with a hiss, his eyes dark and glaring as the smirk is nothing but a deep frown and his fangs flashing. He really hated his mates sometimes and yet he can't blame them. They have needs and they need him, but FUCK every single day of the fucking year? Just no, they can fucking chill out or go get their dicks torn off

"Alastor, baby, that expression doesn't suit you, my darling." Lucifer said with a soft purr. A coax. He watched as his mate pouts and being a grumpy ass, but they do have something to talk about. "Now that we finally caught you, we need to talk"

Alastor actually raised an eyebrow. "Oh really?" He asks

"No, we're just saying shit to distract you so we can jump you and have you dry out before the night ends." Angel said with a bored look. Cleaning and playing with his nails

Alastor knows Angel will say shit when he wants a reaction; all part of the game, but it's obvious this is a big deal. Without giving much fight, he just sits up more. "Fine, what it is. I do have work to do after all"

"I'll make it simple, Angel and I have noticed we have been rather.... Unfair to you. We ask so much from you, yet we can't seem to allow you have your own say in shit and that actually is setting me off. You're my mate and you deserve happiness as anyone else, so Angel and I have come up with a plan. More of a challenge and a game. Winner takes all basically"

"A... Game? What game?"

Angel straightens up more with a flashy smile. "Humans have this challenge called "No Nut November" so Lucie and I looked more into it and it's a challenge on who will last the longest and not cum for the entire month of November. Lucie and I thought for you, we will try to go for a month in NOT asking you for any favors sexually and this month will be about you." Angel said with a shrug but there was genuine in his off color eyes

Alastor looks between Angel then Lucifer then back at Angel. "A month just for myself?"

Lucifer sighs and sits on the bed, pulling Alastor onto his lap. "Yes darling, a month for yourself. You deserve it for dealing with us for this year. And this is an apology how we mistreated you and as I said, this is a game. Don't think we will hold back by December~"

Alastor rolled his eyes but his smile seems to come back as he faces Angel. "I'm betting Lucie in kicking your ass in this challenge, my little spider"

There was a golden flare in Angel's eyes as his own smirk shows up. "Challenge accepted"


	3. Day 1: Hands Off My Ass

Alastor was outside, enjoying the sounds of Hell screaming and sounding of life (the irony isn't it?) Alastor watches as the any turns blood red, indicating morning is here. Since the challenge was set up, he's been rather... Supposed by how much his lovers are willing to go through just for him. The fact they are giving him an entire month of no sex, just him, it's rather... Sweet of them to say the least. But being with a porn star and the ruler of Hell, they both will eventually start to break, such of now. "If you got your hands off my ass, Angel, I will personally tear your arms out." He threaten

Angel whined but does as told, pouting. "Lucie can grab your ass all he wants and you don't threaten to cut off his balls, yet when _I_ do it, it's a "OH HELL NO!" from you? That's not fair, babe"

"Lucifer doesn't grab my ass to fuck me unlike you, so it is fair. But now you mention it, maybe I should punish you both by not grabbing me in general." He turned and smirks at Angel

Angel knew he was fucked. Like ROYALLY fucked. See, he always felt he was nothing more than just a hole to fuck by both his mates. Lucifer and Alastor knew each other for far too long and how Alastor is now was all because of Lucifer. Lucifer is Alastor's everything. So having the ruler of Hell on his ass because his mate is telling them both not to grab him for this game was a death sentence. Either let a pot hole be played and he's unable to enjoy that ass unlike Lucie or both suffer and be killed by Lucifer. It really was a no brainer on his answer. He just bolted out of there without a glance over his shoulder. Besides, he has a way to enjoy Alastor's ass in the bathroom ;)


	4. Day 2: WHERE IS MY STAFF!?

It was day two and Alastor felt like he was losing his mind. After a day with Lucifer and Angel and their reluctant touch and stare, he was more than happy to get away from them both to spend time with Charlie. The problem? He can't seem to find his staff. He knows he left it in their room, but nothing and surprising no one was in there. Where the fuck is it at for one and for two, where are his mates?

After spending nearly twenty minutes looking for **_something_** , Alastor finally lost it. "WHERE IS MY STAFF YOU TWO!"

It didn't take long before shuffling and angry whispers were heard from a room next to Alastor and soon a flustered Lucifer comes out with Angel not too far. "Your staff, you say..." Lucifer said with some caution. His eyes anywhere but on his mate

Alastor looked between the two, Angel looks ready to run. His head was down and playing with his hands. He felt his lips flashing his teeth and he approached Angel. One hand under his chin go raise his head so Angel was looking at him, and as sweetly as he could, "where is it, Spiderling~"

Angel whimpered, nearly crashing. "Where's what, Daddy"

"The staff, where is it. _Daddy_ can't help his friends if he doesn't have his staff, baby boy." He felt a little weird, but he had to be soft sometimes or many things can happen if pushed too hard with Angel

Angel bit his lip, looking between Lucifer and Alastor before walking back into the room

Lucifer cussed under his breath

"Be proud I'm not going to attack you both." Alastor promised. He did have somewhere to be after all over a half an hour ago

Lucifer smirks, "you say that now, my love~"

Alastor raised an eyebrow, about to make a comment before Angel came back out with his staff in his hands. He cooed at the little spider, petting him and grabs his staff before noticing at how... Sticky it felt? And slippery? What the fuck did they do to his staff?!

All Alastor heard was laughter from his mate as his eye twitches because his lovers USED HIS STAFF AS A SEX TOY!?!

To say Angel and Lucifer were let off "easy" is not all true. They just couldn't be punished too roughly as Alastor had a mental break down and went bat shit crazy in Hell as his mind broke from his discovery for his poor staff


	5. Day 3: Some Sleep

Alastor was exhausted. Beyond exhausted. Today was actually a bad day not just for him, but for his lovers as well. A bad day for all. Suicide is no joke and having one of your lovers popping pills like candy is a serious matter. He sighs, plopping face down onto the bed. A headache throbbing; making him want to tear his brain out to stop the pain. He felt the bed dip and growled. Thinking Lucifer is trying to make the mood lighter or get under his skin. But he felt many hands around him and someone nuzzling him. Their face wet and he sighs, turning around and holds Angel close. "Hush, my love. We all have bad days." He whispers, knowing anything loud will have many affects on Angel. He rather be sweet and gentle with him. He rubs Angel's back, whispering sweet nothingness into his ear. Eventually he felt a body behind him and he curls up against Lucifer. All of them close and tight and not wanting to actually speak as there's nothing to say. Today was just a bad day, but tomorrow will be better. For now, they just need each other. Some rest will do them all good and within comfort with each other will only strengthen their bonds

Yeah, some sleep will do them all well...


End file.
